Counting

Can I get a head count of how many of you count to anywhere between 1 & 5 to get your kids to do something? I do it all the time. All the time, despite wondering what this means about my parenting skills, I prefer it to yelling or spanking both of which I have been known to do on occasion.

So...Little Man was sick, but coming out of it. We were packing up to go to daycare and work. I was trying to get my almost 4 year old, who is fairly self-sufficient, to get on his jacket. My attempts fell on the heels of him not wanting to get out of bed, not wanting to brush his teeth, not wanting to come downstairs...I was already annoyed. So when he wouldn't put his jacket on this is the unbelievable conversation we had:

Me: "little man. Put. Your. Jacket. On. Now."
Little Man: Waaaaa, Waaaa, Waaaa. "I can't. I don't know how."
Me: "If you do not put your jacket on by the time I count to 5, there will be no movie in the car."
Little Man: Waaaaa, Waaaa, Waaaa. "I can't."
Me: One.
Little Man: Waaaaa. Waaaa. Waaaa.
Me: Two.
Little Man: Ahhhhh. Waaaa. Ahhhh. "STOP COUNTING."
Me: "Three."
Little Man: WHAAAAAAAAA. "STOP COUNTING YOU IDIOT!"
Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I could not believe my ears. Did my precious Little Man, whom I carried in my womb for 9 months, whom I nursed for one year, whom I snuggle when he's hurt, just call me an idiot and use it in perfect context? By the time I was done yelling at him up one side and down the other, I am fairly certain he will not say the word IDIOT ever again.

When it was all said and done, I realized that he really doesn't know what an idiot is. He knew how to use it in context, knew that it is a name you call another person, but didn't really know what it meant. What I wonder, however, is what's the next horrible thing he's going to call me and how long will I be waiting for that one?

8 People Raise Their Wine Glasses to Me:

Jessica said...

My mornings sound very similar to your's. Except when I count and say one, Hoss will say two. He thinks it's a game. That's in between the screaming. So far we don't have any name calling. I'm not sure what I'll do if that occurs.

Rebecca said...

I do the counting thing too and I always annoy myself when I do it, I think it is a mom thing.

I haven't been called an idiot yet but I am "mean" and a few times the kids "don't love me" - that one stings, but I know they don't mean it.

Oh, and on a near daily basis Bean says "I not talking to you anymore!" and storms out of the room. She really hates not getting her way.

Anonymous said...

Oh. My. Gosh. Even though you know they don't really know what they're saying, it still blows your mind when that happens.

I counted with Joey, but I don't do it with my 2 littler ones because it doesn't work. They seem to think it gives them 5 seconds to argue and carry on. Don't ask me what does work because over here, it's just trial and error. :o)

Devon said...

Goodness gracious. I can almost see the shock on your face. I am sorry to have laughed at your little man.

designHER Momma said...

oh no he didn't. although, my 4 year old girl called me a "dude" yesterday...

robin said...

I seem to count to 3 (with long pauses in between) ALL the time! I'm hoping (dreaming) that one day, I'll just have to request something only once!

Carol said...

Oh mym that made me laugh...Did you stop counting or speed up?

Amanda said...

At least you give your kids to 5. My kids are not as fortunate...they only get to 3! :)

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